So its Tuesday Dec 13th and we are going to find out the sex of baby bannon at 2:15pm. All day i am just preparing to go to see my baby and find out if ruby will have a brother or a sister. I have a feeling of confidence that i didnt have yesterday after hearing her heartbeat last night. So i drink my 8 oz of water and refrain from using the bathroom 30 minutes before like i am instructed. Now on a side note i did originally have an ultrasound on friday dec 17th but i wanted one of those 4D images of this baby so i changed appointments to an imaging place that offered them. Ok so we Got to the office and met Chris in the parking lot, he was so excited and so was ruby. I had told her we were gonna be able to see the baby today and we will get to watch a video of her moving around in my belly. So went checked in and went in for the appointment. they had a huge screen in front of the bed so we could all see the baby really well. The technician came in and got started, she asked us if we wanted to know the sex of the baby and i saud yes. I could already tell by her moving around the babys legs what it was but i didnt say anything. She showed us the heart and told us it was healthy and that her brain development was good and her growth was on point with her gestational age. Thats when she rolled the ultrasound wand over my belly and said ITS A GIRL! i knew it! i figured if there was a penis we would have seen it by now and so i thought she was gonna say that! SISTERS! i was so excited for ruby to have a sister, i always wanted a sister and now my girls were gonna have each other. I was so relieved to see her moving around in there bc i hadnt really felt her that much so its great to know she is in there moving around. She was opening her mouth and stretching her legs and waving her arms, it was almost as if she was showing me "see mom im ok im just too tiny still for you to feel me". I noticed at that time that they were running a fetal heart monitor and the technician asked me what her previous heart rates had been. I told her we were just at the midwife center the day before and that it was 155, it is always around 150-155. "Hmmm" she said "so its always been a little high then." um no not according to everything i know i was told it was normal but what is she talking about. So she said everything looked to be just fine and that she was gonna get us a dvd and some pictures of the baby and she would return shortly. It took a a really long time, or at least it felt like it was a really long time and i said to chris "somethings wrong" . He said no way we just saw her and everything was fine im sure its nothing dont worry. I am worried, somethings not right i can feel it. Finally after about 20 minutes a doctor comes in and sayd that she is the attending physician at the imaging center and that the baby is growing fine and everything looks good but that she wants to send us to a fetal heart specialist for a EKG because the babys heartrate was between 160-180 for 10 consecutive minutes and that it was a little high. FUCK! you have got to be kidding me! i mean i cant believe i cant leave this place just happy to have a little girl coming i now have to be worried about this EKG. She reassured us that it was probably nothing and that it was just a safety precaution. For some reason though i didnt feel OK, i felt uneasy and i just wanted to get out of there. She gave me a card with the Dr.s name and number and before i was even in the elevator i called and scheduled an appointment for Friday Dec 16 at 9 am. If i could have gone right then and there i would have but they couldn't see us till Friday. Oh and no i didn't even get the damn 4D ultrasound bc the technician said the baby wasn't in a good position. I will always wonder if that was true or if she was hiding something from us. I have really learned that i have a high intuition of people and situations and that i need to be more in tune with that, something about that place and that woman rubbed me wrong and i feel like i know why. SO we walked out to the car and i just broke down bc i just want some relief with this baby. I cant even be happy that im having a girl bcfacebook about how excited we were to be having another girl and that ruby was having a sister. It felt good to see her today and in my heart i named her that day, her name was June, i knew that was her name bc i saw her in my head. I visualized June in my future for the first time and it was an amazing feeling.
Listening to Florence + The Machine "Heartlines"
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